Funeral Poems, Readings, Music, Quotations & Thoughts

All Things Pass ~ Lao Tzu

Lao TsuAncient words are always comforting. They remind us that loss and grief has always been part of life, part of the human condition.

In the sixth century BC the great Chinese philosopher and father of Taoism had this to say:

A sunrise does not last all morning
All things pass
A cloudburst does not last all day
All things pass
Nor a sunset all night
All things pass
What always changes?
Earth...sky...thunder... mounatin...water.... wind...fire...lake...
These change And if these do not last Do man's visions last?
Do man's illusions?

Take things as they come
All things pass

Noel Coward's last Poem

Noel Coward stayed in Jamaica with Ian Fleming in the 1940s and enjoyed his time there so much that he first bought a home there and then built himself a new house called Firefly overlooking the sea on the North Coast.Noel Coward For many years he spent the winter months in Jamaica and then stayed most of the year round as he got older.  He loved the climate and the quiet and the view out over the ocean. He wrote "I love this place, it deeply enchants me. Whatever happens to this silly world, nothing much is likely to happen here."

Coward died at Firefly in 1973. Written on a wall in the house was this last poem:

When I have fears, as Keats had fears,
Of the moment I'll cease to be,
I console myself with vanished years,
Remembered laughter, remembered tears,
And the peace of the changing sea.

And there's another good Noel Coward quip I came across recently, also very suitable for funerals:

We have no reliable guarantee that the afterlife will be any less exasperating than this one, have we?

Wordsworth on the Death of a Six Year Old

In November of 1812 William and Mary Wordsworth's third child became sick with the measles. His name was Thomas, he was just six years old and seemed to be holding up well for five days before he suddenly died on the first of December. William WordsworthThe death of a child was much more common two hundred years ago but it can hardly have been any easier to bear. This is what William wrote to his friend 

For myself dear Southey I dare not say in what state of mind I am; I loved the Boy with the utmost love of which my soul is capable, and he is taken from me - yet in the agony of my spirit in surrendering such a treasure I feel a thousand times richer than if I had never possessed it. God comfort and save you and all our friends and us all from a repetition of such trials. - O Southey feel for me!

I Wish You Were Here, Dear

Joseph Brodsky was put on trial in his native Russia for 'Social Parasitism' in the 1970s and imprisoned and sent to Siberia for hard labour for his conviction that he had a calling as a poet. He finally fled to the West and was awarded a Nobel Prize for Literature in 1987. Here he reads a late poem, written in English.

 

A Song

I wish you were here, dear, I wish you were here.
I wish you sat on the sofa
and I sat near.
the handkerchief could be yours,
the tear could be mine, chin-bound.
Though it could be, of course,
the other way around.

I wish you were here, dear,
I wish you were here.
I wish we were in my car,
and you'd shift the gear.
we'd find ourselves elsewhere,
on an unknown shore.
Or else we'd repair
To where we've been before.

I wish you were here, dear,
I wish you were here.
I wish I knew no astronomy
when stars appear,
when the moon skims the water
that sighs and shifts in its slumber.
I wish it were still a quarter
to dial your number.

I wish you were here, dear,
in this hemisphere,
as I sit on the porch
sipping a beer.
It's evening, the sun is setting;
boys shout and gulls are crying.
What's the point of forgetting
If it's followed by dying?

Joseph Brodsky

The Merry Cemetery

A unique cemetery lies in the village of Sapata in Romania where a local wood carver produced about 800 colorful and celebratory oak  tombstones before his own death in 1977. They show images of the lives of the dead and sometimes images of their deaths and many have text panels describing the life of the deceased. There is no somberness here, only a great sense of joy in the lives of the ordinary people celebrated in images and poetry.

The local artist responsible for it all, Stan Ioan Pătraş created his own tomb before he died and was buried here surronded by his life's work.

Săpânța

Săpânța Cimetière Joyeux Sapanta Cemetery08

Unforgettable

Nat King Cole Died in 1965 when he was only 46 years old and his daughter Natalie was 15. In 1991 Natalie Cole recorded a duet with the voice of her long dead father - Unforgettable.

Walk On

This blog missed National Poetry Day, but I think it might have been on that day that something half heard on the radio stuck in my mind. Someone was reading what he described as a popular poem which went like this:

Hammerstein

When you walk through a storm
Hold your head up high
And don't be afraid of the dark.

At the end of the storm
Is a golden sky
And the sweet silver song of the lark.

Walk on through the wind,
Walk on through the rain
Though your dreams be tossed and blown.

Walk on, walk on with hope in your heart
And you'll never walk alone,
You'll never walk alone

 

Of course it is Oscar Hammerstein's lyric from the 1945 musical Carousel, recorded hundreds if not thousands of times since then by too many great musicians to list but including Judy Garland, Doris Day, Bob Dylan, Jerry and the Pacemakers and Elvis Presley and adopted as an anthem by Liverpool FC supporters. For this blog however, it is a beautiful poem: short, succinct, totally accessible, evocative in so many personal ways and suprising in its familiarity. A fine uplifting final reading.

Comedian Frankie Boyle Chooses a Song for his Funeral

In the Guardian last Saturday

What is the closest you've ever come to death?
 - Middlesbrough.

What is the most important lesson life has taught you?
 - People hate jokes.

What song would you like played at your funeral?

Crash Landing in the Hudson River

In the paper at the weekend was this account by a young woman who was on board flight 1549 which crash landed in the Hudson river after having its engines disabled by flying into a flock of geese:

I crash-landed in the Hudson

Everything went eerily quiet – the familiar drone of the engines had disappeared. Gripping the armrests, I said to myself, "OK, I am 27, I've never been married, but if it's my time to go, I'm OK with this." A strange peace washed over me, one I've never experienced before or since. All my life I had struggled with anxiety and had learned coping techniques, but this was different.

Flight 1549

Mummy Portraits

Mummy with Portrait

Around the first century in Egypt if you could afford a good funeral the body of the deceased was wrapped in bands to make a classic 'mummy'. It became the fashion to insert a portrait painted on wood into the mummy to show the face of the loved one as it was in life. There are around 900 of these 'mummy portraits known to have survived. Their naturalistic style seems astonishingly contemporary. They are like faces from a photographer's studio session, totally credible and totally human. People like us.

Here are just a few of these remarkable survivors.

 

 
 
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